Officer: “I notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?”
Driver: “I noticed your eyes are glazed over. Have you been eating donuts?”
What happens when a police officer goes to bed?
He becomes an undercover cop.
Q: Did you hear about the man in the town who’s stealing the wheels of police cars.
A: Yeah, the police are working tirelessly to catch him.
Q: Did you hear about the criminal who stole a lamp?
A: He got a very light sentence.
Why is a traffic cop the strongest man in the world?
Because he can stop a 10-ton truck by holding up his hand!
Q: Why did the thief wear blue gloves?
A: He didn’t want to be caught red-handed.
I got a call from the police station saying they want to interview me.
Funny… I don’t remember applying for a job there.
Q: What do you call a female police officer playing guitar?
A: She-riff.
Who works in tandem with the grammar police?
Corrections officers.
How do cops greet people?
Policed to meet you!
Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected fowl play.
Officer: “Why did you park here?”
Me: “The sign says, ‘Fine for parking.’”
