Q: Why happened when the pizza place folded?
A: They started selling calzones.
Q: What happened when a mummified slice of pizza was dug up in Italy?
A: The man who uncovered it says, “It’s a pizza of our pasta.”
Q: What happened when the pizza walked into the bar?
A: The bartender said: “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”
Pizza Jokes
Q: Did you hear about the Hipster who burned his tongue?
A: He ate the pizza before it was cool.
Q: How did the Dalai Lama order his pizza?
A: He said: “Make me one with everything.”
Q: How do you fix a broken pizza?
A: With tomato paste.
Q: Why was the food critic ambivalent about pizza?
A: On the upside, it has some great toppings. On the downside, it doesn’t.
Q: What happened when the customer asked “Will my pizza be long?”
A: The waiter said: “No, it’ll be round.”
Q: What happened when the Hawaiian pizza burnt?
A: The chef put a new one in on aloha temperature.
Q: Why did the blonde ask for her pizza cut into 6 slices instead of 8?
A: She knew she couldn’t finish 8 slices.
Q: If pizza could talk, what would it say?
A: Probably lots of cheesy things.
Q: Did you hear about the Italian chef with the terminal illness?
A: He pastaway. Now he’s just a pizza history.
Q: Did you hear about the pizza place on the moon?
A: Great pizza, but no atmosphere!
Q: What did the kid say after eating a frozen pizza?
A: Well, that wasn’t very thawed out.
Q: Did you hear the joke about pizza and a broken pencil?
A: It was cheesy and pointless.
Q: Did you hear the new pizza slogan?
A: 7 days without a pizza makes one weak!
Q: If you drop a piece of bread and pizza from a roof, which of them will hit the ground first?
A: The pizza, because it is a fast food.
Q: Mike Tyson was leaving the pizzeria when the waitress asked:
A: “Do you wanna box for the rest of that pizza?”
Q: Want to hear a joke about pizza?
A: Never mind… It’s too cheesy.
Q: What did the cheerleader order on her pizza?
A: Extra pep.
Q: What did the pepperoni say to the cheese?
A: “Slice to meat you!”
Q: What did the pepperoni say to the cheese?
A: “Slice to meat you!”
Q: What did the pizza say to the calzone?
A: Fold me close.
Q: What did the pizza say to the delivery guy?
A: “You don’t pepper-own me.”
Q: What did the pizza slicer say when he wanted to rob the pizza?
A: “Hand over the dough or I’ll cut you!”
Q: What do you call a sleeping pizza?
A: Pizzzzzzzzzzzzzzza.
Q: What does a pizza wear to smell good?
A: Calzogne.
Q: What happens to pizza?
A: It’s here today, gone tomato!
Q: What type of person doesn’t like pizza?
A: A weir-dough.
Q: What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song?
A: Slice, Slice Baby
Q: What’s the difference between a good pizza joke and a bad one?
A: The delivery.
Q: What’s the quickest way to burn 2000 calories?
A: Leave the pizza in the oven too long.
Q: Whats the difference between a large pizza and a bass player?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of 4
Q: Where do pepperonis go on vacation?
A: The Leaning Tower of Pizza.
Q: Why are Dubstep musicians so bad at making pizza?
A: Because they always drop the base
Q: Why did Dracula run out of the pizza restaurant?
A: Someone put garlic on his pizza dough.
Q: Why didn’t the restaurant finish making the take-out pizza order?
A: They ran out of thyme.
Q: Why do restaurants put pizza in square boxes?
A: Because they don’t cut corners.
Q: Why does the mushroom always get invited to pizza parties?
A: Because he’s such a fungi!
Q: Why was the famous pizza so annoyed?
A: It couldn’t get the pepperazzi off its back
Q: Why was the pizzeria desperate for business?
A: Because they kneaded the dough!
Q: Wood fired pizza.
A: How’s pizza gonna get a job now?
